AHHHHHHHH

Today was one of those days that starts off wrong and then looks, briefly, as though a little positive thinking might turn it around, but then just continues to barrel unrelentingly in the same direction, downhill, until it finally crashes and burns. But the litany of incidents is actually kind of funny when I run over it in list form, and as I'm trying not to feel sorry for myself I'm going to try to focus on the humor of my own personal series of unfortunate events:

-I did not get enough sleep. That was because I decided to work last night when offered the chance at the last minute (that was actually fun, I had a great night) and then did not get home until much later than I was expecting. THAT was because on the way home I tried a new route, took a wrong turn, kept myself calm, found 95, knew I could get home from there, and then discovered that my exit was BLOCKED OFF. In typical Massachusetts fashion, the powers that be had neglected to provide even a hint at a possible detour. Clearly if you're not someone who knows where you're going around here, you don't matter much in these parts anyway.

-I blew a fuse this morning getting ready for work. Luckily my roommates were already awake, even though they didn't have to be, but then we couldn't figure out how to fix it before I had to leave for work, I was nearly late, and I felt terrible for causing a problem and leaving them to fix it.

-Saturdays are crazy at work. CRAZY. Year-round, because many of our customers are crazy, but especially now because June is our crazy-busy month.

----here something good happened--everyone at work was very understanding about the fact that I had to get to another job, and they let me leave early despite all the craziness. But do not think that good things might have become the new trend of the day at that point, because they did not.

-I HAD to stop at Walgreen's on the way--won't go into why, but I HAD to--and this involves driving through Newton Center (always frustrating because the people in all the other cars just do their own thing), finding parking, walking kind of far, and finally waiting in a RIDICULOUS line for the RIDICULOUSLY SLOW cashier to ring everyone else up. And then walking back to the car and getting out of Newton.

-Easier said than done, because a lady in a minivan took the trouble to cut me off just so she could drive a minimum of 5 mph under the speed limit all the way to the highway. So I was going to be late for work anyway.

-And then, getting on the highway, I saw something really awful involving a squirrel which I really can't stand to recount, but I totally lost it. I just don't handle things like that well, or even at all, so then I was bawling like a baby and wondering if I should do something about it and calling people who might know what to do, and then I called my dad and he was wonderful and made me feel a little better.

-But then I got to Work #2, my first night waitressing on my own, and it was TERRIBLE. I cried a little bit at work, which people probably noticed but happily nobody said anything. Then I messed up a lot of things, nearly dropped a tray of food on a table, completely failed to notice a new table in my section, and did a lot of other ridiculous things that basically wound up making me look really stupid and wasting the restaurant a lot of money in comped food and managers' time spent apologizing to customers. All in all a pretty bad first day no matter what, and much worse because I was in no emotional state to handle it with aplomb. When I'm exhausted I get weepy and unhappy. I didn't cry again (surprisingly), but I did get more flustered and do more idiotic things every time something went wrong.


I have to go back there tomorrow and try again, all day, but right now I get to go to bed so hopefully tomorrow I'll be more mentally prepared to handle my own mistakes. This is not a rant or a list of complaints. I think it's partly venting, and also partly here because I really thought this all sounded funny in my head. That was before I wrote it down.